OK i've put quite a bit of thought into this. I catch myself a lot, calling you out when something bothers you...trust me..I know when it does...and part of me (the sick part) just feels like having you explain yourself just so I can give you my opinion..because most of the time the reasons you say it bothers you are not really facts...they are more your own insecurities. Just a few situations that happen time and time again that put you in a state of constant and almost serious depression and guilt about the way you think you look, that really do more damage to yourself because of the strain it puts on the relationship rather than making you feel better due to the reassurance from me:
A word or idea that goes unnoticed. (mainly the word or idea is twisted and turned to what you think it means...though I have to admit I am guilty of it also)
A beautiful and seemingly confident girl who you catch eye me.
Any talk about how sweet, cute, smart, Etc.. one of my ex-gfs or female friends are.
My reminiscing of the fun times I've had with female friends or exes or crushes I once had. ( You do it too! )
Any girl of my type ( or what you think my type would be- and of course, that's solely based upon what media feels "our" types should be) walking past looking good while you feel your wearing some old jeans and throw away shirt or blouse..looking rough .....fun times.
Or how about spending free time looking through photos of past girlfriends or flings..comparing yourself to them and accusing me of that being what I want.
Stop comparing yourself with my past. There's a reason my exes are exes. If I wanted one of them over you....you would be the ex and she would be in my arms here in the present!
If you weren't the one I wanted I wouldn't
Hold doors open for you everywhere we went,
Look at you with those deep eyes every few minutes.
Randomly grab your hand and hold on tightly.
Wipe your tears away when you finally break down about how shitty your day is going then hug you tightly and hold you when I know you need attention and
re-assure you over and over how much you mean to me.
Think of you all day, everyday. Especially when you aren't around.
Talk about you to anyone who will listen. Telling them how happy I am or sometimes how much you hurt me, how beautiful and sexy you are. Even when you aren't around to hear it.
Worry about you constantly. Asking if you are okay when you squirm and have a look of pain on your face from the occasional cramp or stomach ache. Give you a neck rub when I see you rubbing it after sitting at your computer for hours on end. Get you a glass of cold water and advil when you have a bad headache before you go to bed.
I trust you and have nothing to hide so you have access to all of my stuff. I tell you when i'm chatting with a girl (friend or foe, ex or former crush). I tell you what's been said, and if it's on the phone even put her on speaker if I see you are looking rather annoyed.
I always makes sure you are taken care of for work in the morning.. lunch, etc . Even going as far as scolding you if you start down a self-destructive path. I won't hurt you. I won't let anyone else hurt you. And mostly, I won't even let you hurt yourself.
Girl, You don't see that this boy loves you?
Take it in, relish it, own it, and most of all....don't ruin it. Be open with your thoughts and fears. Work things out. Don't throw in the towel based on your own insecurities.
You are the light at the end of my tunnel, my baby, my sweetie, my girl.
You are beautiful, smart, funny, sexy, fun, and perfect for me.
Live It. Be It. Love It
Tuesday, February 9, 2010
Thursday, February 4, 2010
Technology...another world?
In the last one hundred years or more, technology has been advancing at an extremely fast pace. The first several decades marked a change in travel and communications..we had the first automobile, radio, film developments. The 50's marked the official end of humanity's "struggle for survival" and the beginning of its quest for a really relaxing afternoon. The first wireless remote, The television is one device that never ceases to amaze. From the comfort of one's couch, a person can be entertained, educated, and informed. It allows people without the necessary means to travel to places they've only dreamt of.
Also, the microwave, no longer do you have to wait to boil or bake..you can just simply "zap it." the 60's had the first industrial robot and unmanned aerial aircraft. The 70's and 80's had first cell phones, no longer does a person have to walk to the corner store in order to place a phone call, they can now place the call from almost anywhere in the world with the cell phone carried on their belt or in their pocket. First invitro fertilization (test tube baby), which is a miracle to some and to others an abomination, and that brings me to the lovely GPS which is only a good thing if your wanting to know where your children are or where those nukes are going that just left the fortress..it is never good for those that aren't where they are supposed to be!!.
It is no longer necessary for a person to deal with traffic and long lines at shopping malls since technology now allows a person to shop from the convenience of their easy chair. Which brings me to mobile technology...it isn't bad enough that we have created these mindless applications to indulge ourselves with all day long (because the good lord knows we don't have anything else to do) but we make it so wherever we are in the world we can access these apps...which multiplies the time spent with our heads in a 6" x 3" (some cases smaller) screen and get lost, oblivious to the world around us. I have found that these applications on Facebook are extremely addicting...I don't believe there is anyone who can disagree...and for those who don't have the apps, they're the smart ones...they know how addicting it is they see the zombie nation. These are but a few examples of the cunning ingenuity of mankind that have allowed this race to progress into the twenty-first century, despite some people's beliefs that technology is making mankind a stronger whole, these and other technological advances are working to turn the human race into lazy introverts who have lost contact with each other and the land in which they live.
Children as young as toddlers are using simple computers, which have been designed as toys to make them both appealing and easy to understand. Through the use of digital technology, children are able to interact with their toys in a way that was impossible in the past, engaging their minds by teaching them, for example, colors and shapes to the sounds of happy giggling or cheerful music . Learning becomes as simple as hugging a toy and as pleasurable as listening to music. Which helps develop the mind, but in turn will keep the interest on a device for most. Instead of spending time outdoors exploring and getting dirty..time is spent in cyberspace or video games.
Now don't get me wrong...I love computers and certain devices that make it more comfortable, but there is a line that is beyond comfort and I think the proper word to use would be ridiculous. When you cant even sit and have a nice evening with your partner without either a status update coming through on the phone or having to check every 5 minutes on your inbox just because you can do it without sitting in front of a computer screen, people, there is a serious problem. When a computer or device becomes more interesting than a living, breathing creature...where does it go from here........
Also, the microwave, no longer do you have to wait to boil or bake..you can just simply "zap it." the 60's had the first industrial robot and unmanned aerial aircraft. The 70's and 80's had first cell phones, no longer does a person have to walk to the corner store in order to place a phone call, they can now place the call from almost anywhere in the world with the cell phone carried on their belt or in their pocket. First invitro fertilization (test tube baby), which is a miracle to some and to others an abomination, and that brings me to the lovely GPS which is only a good thing if your wanting to know where your children are or where those nukes are going that just left the fortress..it is never good for those that aren't where they are supposed to be!!.
It is no longer necessary for a person to deal with traffic and long lines at shopping malls since technology now allows a person to shop from the convenience of their easy chair. Which brings me to mobile technology...it isn't bad enough that we have created these mindless applications to indulge ourselves with all day long (because the good lord knows we don't have anything else to do) but we make it so wherever we are in the world we can access these apps...which multiplies the time spent with our heads in a 6" x 3" (some cases smaller) screen and get lost, oblivious to the world around us. I have found that these applications on Facebook are extremely addicting...I don't believe there is anyone who can disagree...and for those who don't have the apps, they're the smart ones...they know how addicting it is they see the zombie nation. These are but a few examples of the cunning ingenuity of mankind that have allowed this race to progress into the twenty-first century, despite some people's beliefs that technology is making mankind a stronger whole, these and other technological advances are working to turn the human race into lazy introverts who have lost contact with each other and the land in which they live.
Children as young as toddlers are using simple computers, which have been designed as toys to make them both appealing and easy to understand. Through the use of digital technology, children are able to interact with their toys in a way that was impossible in the past, engaging their minds by teaching them, for example, colors and shapes to the sounds of happy giggling or cheerful music . Learning becomes as simple as hugging a toy and as pleasurable as listening to music. Which helps develop the mind, but in turn will keep the interest on a device for most. Instead of spending time outdoors exploring and getting dirty..time is spent in cyberspace or video games.
Now don't get me wrong...I love computers and certain devices that make it more comfortable, but there is a line that is beyond comfort and I think the proper word to use would be ridiculous. When you cant even sit and have a nice evening with your partner without either a status update coming through on the phone or having to check every 5 minutes on your inbox just because you can do it without sitting in front of a computer screen, people, there is a serious problem. When a computer or device becomes more interesting than a living, breathing creature...where does it go from here........
Monday, February 1, 2010
Why does loss hurt us so...?
Losing someone is among the most painful experiences in a person's life. Not only is death difficult to understand, it also brings with it a range of overwhelming emotions. Everyone is affected by it at some point, and each person will deal with grief differently.
If there exists one experience that, throughout history and around the world, binds mankind together, it is death. Death is something we all must face -- no exercise or diet regimen, no meditation techniques, no amount of money can avoid it. It is the great equalizer.
The finality of death, coupled with the uncertainty of an afterlife, results in fear, for many. We see it all around us as we try so hard to stop the aging process.
Death does not end life , But instead opens the door , Or is the door to higher forms of life. The Earth is only a Temporary Abode for Man And Woman as a means of Redemption (Psalms 111: 9)
Why, would be the next question to ask. Why is there an ending?...why should so much hurt be involved?...why should one person watch another hurt as this constant rotation of life ever continues. I will have to admit that I am afraid of death. Not afraid of my own death but of death of loved ones around me. I am afraid to see them go...Would that be selfish to feel like that. to want to make the ones I love say goodbye and hope to see me again and not the other way around? all because Im afraid it will hurt so much...because I know how it feels. It is a constant battle between accepting that there is something bigger than what is tangible and no real purpose at all, well, a purpose to make a difference in an afterlife anyway. I do struggle with it everyday..
I constantly wonder where we go. Is it this far off land that is unreachable to beings that come from earth or any planet with life such as ours? Or is it a parallel world that you cross over into? What I do know...or believe I should say, is that there is a divine entity that is behind this unseen force. Though I have some difficulty with how it is all put together...it all comes down to one huge similarity. A higher power.
If there exists one experience that, throughout history and around the world, binds mankind together, it is death. Death is something we all must face -- no exercise or diet regimen, no meditation techniques, no amount of money can avoid it. It is the great equalizer.
The finality of death, coupled with the uncertainty of an afterlife, results in fear, for many. We see it all around us as we try so hard to stop the aging process.
Death does not end life , But instead opens the door , Or is the door to higher forms of life. The Earth is only a Temporary Abode for Man And Woman as a means of Redemption (Psalms 111: 9)
Why, would be the next question to ask. Why is there an ending?...why should so much hurt be involved?...why should one person watch another hurt as this constant rotation of life ever continues. I will have to admit that I am afraid of death. Not afraid of my own death but of death of loved ones around me. I am afraid to see them go...Would that be selfish to feel like that. to want to make the ones I love say goodbye and hope to see me again and not the other way around? all because Im afraid it will hurt so much...because I know how it feels. It is a constant battle between accepting that there is something bigger than what is tangible and no real purpose at all, well, a purpose to make a difference in an afterlife anyway. I do struggle with it everyday..
I constantly wonder where we go. Is it this far off land that is unreachable to beings that come from earth or any planet with life such as ours? Or is it a parallel world that you cross over into? What I do know...or believe I should say, is that there is a divine entity that is behind this unseen force. Though I have some difficulty with how it is all put together...it all comes down to one huge similarity. A higher power.
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